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How to write a eulogy

To write a eulogy, open by introducing yourself and your relationship to the person, share a few memories and qualities that captured who they were, acknowledge the loss honestly, and close with a message of comfort or farewell. Keep it to three to five minutes, and speak from the heart rather than aiming for perfect.

What a eulogy is for

A eulogy honors a life and helps those grieving remember and say goodbye. It does not need to cover everything - a few true, specific memories that capture the person's spirit matter more than a full biography. Warmth and honesty resonate more than polish.

A gentle structure

Introduce yourself and your connection, share two or three memories or qualities that show who they were, acknowledge the grief in the room honestly, and close with words of comfort, gratitude, or farewell. This arc gives you something to hold onto while speaking.

How long and what tone

Aim for three to five minutes. A eulogy can hold both sorrow and light - a fond, gentle story or a touch of the person's own humor is welcome and often comforting. Write the way you would speak, not formally.

Delivering it while grieving

Print it in large text, mark where to pause, and ask someone to be ready to step in if you cannot continue - both are completely acceptable. If facing the blank page is too much right now, you can enter a few memories and details and get a gentle first draft to shape into your own words.

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Frequently asked questions

How long should a eulogy be?

Three to five minutes is typical. A few heartfelt memories carry more than a long recitation of facts.

What should I include in a eulogy?

Your relationship to the person, two or three specific memories or qualities, an honest note on the loss, and a closing of comfort or farewell.

Is it okay to include humor in a eulogy?

Yes. A gentle, fond memory or a touch of the person's own humor can comfort mourners and celebrate who they were.